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Literature Text
I used to think I knew what's right,
have your mind control your heart
I didn't know the heart would fight
back an everlasting war
I used to think I knew what's good
Let the sane control the soul
But I still need my insane heart
If I'm ever going to feel whole
...In the end, the sanest choice
Will be to satisfy the heart,
for a happy mind and soul
can create the finest art.
have your mind control your heart
I didn't know the heart would fight
back an everlasting war
I used to think I knew what's good
Let the sane control the soul
But I still need my insane heart
If I'm ever going to feel whole
...In the end, the sanest choice
Will be to satisfy the heart,
for a happy mind and soul
can create the finest art.
Please, do comment and be as critical as you can, i'd like to improve my writing and anything you say about it will help me a lot 
I wrote this a while ago, nearly at the same time as i wrote "In your footsteps to the sun" (see the thumb below). This is the song i was referring to in the Author's Comments.
The two pieces are quite similar, and they certainly share a theme, because at the time of writing, i was very confused about something going on in my life.
That's all passed, luckily. 
For
Lyrical contest.
Edit: Yay, it won 3rd place!
©Namenotrequired
Under Creative Commons Licence
In your footsteps to the sun
I wrote this a while ago, nearly at the same time as i wrote "In your footsteps to the sun" (see the thumb below). This is the song i was referring to in the Author's Comments.
The two pieces are quite similar, and they certainly share a theme, because at the time of writing, i was very confused about something going on in my life.
That's all passed, luckily. For
Lyrical contest.Edit: Yay, it won 3rd place!
©Namenotrequired
Under Creative Commons Licence
In your footsteps to the sun
In Your Footsteps To The SunTo turn his pain into our aid Is what makes my hero's heart From all his suffering he made the greatest works of art. I will gladly walk his path, in his footsteps to the sun; If that means to let you break me, to your hammer i will run. Beat my soul, beat my senses, beat my heart, don't make me whole... May my soul now heal the senses once the senses healed the soul.
Comments48
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I like the two first paragraph, but the third give me a strange feeling. For me, there is a break in the poem's harmony on the third paragraph. Maybe it's too short, it miss something between the second and the third paragraph.
But it is only my own thinking^^
But it is only my own thinking^^